Borderline personality disorder - Symptoms and causes (2024)

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Overview

Borderline personality disorder is a mental health condition that affects the way people feel about themselves and others, making it hard to function in everyday life. It includes a pattern of unstable, intense relationships, as well as impulsiveness and an unhealthy way of seeing themselves. Impulsiveness involves having extreme emotions and acting or doing things without thinking about them first.

People with borderline personality disorder have a strong fear of abandonment or being left alone. Even though they want to have loving and lasting relationships, the fear of being abandoned often leads to mood swings and anger. It also leads to impulsiveness and self-injury that may push others away.

Borderline personality disorder usually begins by early adulthood. The condition is most serious in young adulthood. Mood swings, anger and impulsiveness often get better with age. But the main issues of self-image and fear of being abandoned, as well as relationship issues, go on.

If you have borderline personality disorder, know that many people with this condition get better with treatment. They can learn to live stabler, more-fulfilling lives.

Symptoms

Borderline personality disorder affects how you feel about yourself, relate to others and behave.

Symptoms may include:

  • A strong fear of abandonment. This includes going to extreme measures so you're not separated or rejected, even if these fears are made up.
  • A pattern of unstable, intense relationships, such as believing someone is perfect one moment and then suddenly believing the person doesn't care enough or is cruel.
  • Quick changes in how you see yourself. This includes shifting goals and values, as well as seeing yourself as bad or as if you don't exist.
  • Periods of stress-related paranoia and loss of contact with reality. These periods can last from a few minutes to a few hours.
  • Impulsive and risky behavior, such as gambling, dangerous driving, unsafe sex, spending sprees, binge eating, drug misuse, or sabotaging success by suddenly quitting a good job or ending a positive relationship.
  • Threats of suicide or self-injury, often in response to fears of separation or rejection.
  • Wide mood swings that last from a few hours to a few days. These mood swings can include periods of being very happy, irritable or anxious, or feeling shame.
  • Ongoing feelings of emptiness.
  • Inappropriate, strong anger, such as losing your temper often, being sarcastic or bitter, or physically fighting.

When to see a doctor

If you're aware that you have any of the symptoms above, talk to your doctor or other regular healthcare professional or see a mental health professional.

If you have thoughts about suicide

If you have fantasies or mental images about hurting yourself, or you have thoughts about suicide, get help right away by taking one of these actions:

  • Call 911 or your local emergency number right away.
  • Contact a suicide hotline. In the U.S., call or text 988 to reach the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Or use the Lifeline Chat. Services are free and confidential.
  • U.S. veterans or service members who are in crisis can call 988 and then press "1" for the Veterans Crisis Line. Or text 838255. Or chat online.
  • The Suicide & Crisis Lifeline in the U.S. has a Spanish language phone line at 1-888-628-9454 (toll-free).
  • Call your mental health professional, doctor or another member of your healthcare team.
  • Reach out to a loved one, close friend, trusted peer or co-worker.
  • Contact someone from your faith community.

If you notice symptoms in a family member or friend, talk to that person about seeing a doctor or mental health professional. But you can't force someone to change. If the relationship causes you a lot of stress, you may find it helpful to see a therapist.

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Causes

As with other mental health conditions, the causes of borderline personality disorder aren't fully known. In addition to environmental factors — such as a history of child abuse or neglect — borderline personality disorder may be linked to:

  • Genetics. Some studies of twins and families suggest that personality disorders may be inherited or strongly related to other mental health conditions among family members.
  • Changes in the brain. Some research has shown that changes in certain areas of the brain affect emotions, impulsiveness and aggression.

Risk factors

Factors related to personality development that can raise the risk of getting borderline personality disorder include:

  • Hereditary predisposition. You may be at a higher risk if a blood relative — your mother, father, brother or sister — has the same or a like condition.
  • Stressful childhood. Many people with the condition report being sexually or physically abused or neglected during childhood. Some people have lost or were separated from a parent or close caregiver when they were young or had parents or caregivers with substance misuse or other mental health issues. Others have been exposed to hostile conflict and unstable family relationships.

Complications

Borderline personality disorder can damage many areas of your life. It can negatively affect close relationships, jobs, school, social activities and how you see yourself.

This can result in:

  • Repeated job changes or losses.
  • Not finishing an education.
  • Multiple legal issues, such as jail time.
  • Conflict-filled relationships, marital stress or divorce.
  • Injuring yourself, such as by cutting or burning, and frequent stays in the hospital.
  • Abusive relationships.
  • Unplanned pregnancies, sexually transmitted infections, motor vehicle accidents, and physical fights due to impulsive and risky behavior.
  • Attempted suicide or death due to suicide.

Also, you may have other mental health conditions, such as:

  • Depression.
  • Alcohol or other substance misuse.
  • Anxiety disorders.
  • Eating disorders.
  • Bipolar disorder.
  • Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
  • Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).
  • Other personality disorders.

By Mayo Clinic Staff

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Jan. 31, 2024

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  1. Personality disorders. In: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders DSM-5-TR. 5th ed. American Psychiatric Association; 2022. https://dsm.psychiatryonline.org. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  2. Borderline personality disorder. National Institute of Mental Health. https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/borderline-personality-disorder/. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  3. Skodol A. Borderline personality disorder: Epidemiology, pathogenesis, clinical features, course, assessment and diagnosis. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  4. Skodol A. Approach to treating patients with borderline personality disorder. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  5. The lifeline and 988. 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. https://988lifeline.org/current-events/the-lifeline-and-988/. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  6. Borderline personality disorder. National Alliance on Mental Illness. https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illness/Mental-Health-Conditions/Borderline-Personality-Disorder. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  7. Starcevic V, et al. Pharmacotherapy of borderline personality disorder: Replacing confusion with prudent pragmatism. Current Opinion in Psychiatry. 2018; doi:10.1097/YCO.0000000000000373.
  8. Veterans Crisis Line. U.S. Department of Veteran Affairs. https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  9. Allen ND (expert opinion). Mayo Clinic. June 21, 2023.
  10. Ekiz E, et al. Systems Training for Emotional Predictability and Problem-Ssolving for borderline personality disorder: A systematic review. Personal Mental Health. 2023; doi:10.1002/pmh.1558.
  11. Mendez-Miller M, et al. Borderline personality disorder. American Family Physician. 2022. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  12. Lebow J. Overview of psychotherapies. https://www.uptodate.com/contents/search. Accessed April 28, 2023.
  13. Elsevier Point of Care. Borderline personality disorder. https://www.clinicalkey.com. Accessed April 28, 2023.

Borderline personality disorder

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Borderline personality disorder - Symptoms and causes (2024)

FAQs

What is the main cause of borderline personality disorder? ›

Environmental, cultural, and social factors: Many people with borderline personality disorder report experiencing traumatic life events, such as abuse, abandonment, or hardship during childhood. Others may have been exposed to unstable, invalidating relationships or conflicts.

Does BPD go away? ›

It's important to remember that borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a lifelong mental health condition. But long-term, ongoing treatment — such as medication and talk therapy — can help manage your symptoms. It's important to see your healthcare team regularly to monitor your treatment plan and symptoms.

What triggers someone with BPD? ›

Separations, disagreements, and rejections—real or perceived—are the most common triggers for symptoms. A person with BPD is highly sensitive to abandonment and being alone, which brings about intense feelings of anger, fear, suicidal thoughts and self-harm, and very impulsive decisions.

What does untreated BPD look like? ›

People with untreated BPD often struggle with daily functioning. They may have difficulty holding jobs or maintaining a stable living situation due to impulsivity, mood swings, and unstable relationships.

What kind of trauma causes BPD? ›

Stressful or traumatic life events

Often having felt afraid, upset, unsupported or invalidated. Family difficulties or instability, such as living with a parent or carer who experienced an addiction. Sexual, physical or emotional abuse or neglect. Losing a parent.

What attracts borderline personality disorder? ›

BPD and Emotional Dysregulation

People with BPD often experience emotional dysregulation, which can make it difficult for them to regulate their own emotions. This means that they may be more likely to be drawn to someone who appears to have their emotions under control, such as a narcissist.

What does a BPD meltdown look like? ›

BPD Meltdown

These episodes involve intense emotional reactions that can be triggered by stress, rejection, or perceived abandonment. During a meltdown, people may experience extreme mood swings, impulsivity, and difficulty calming down.

What is the biggest indicator of BPD? ›

People with borderline personality disorder may experience intense mood swings and feel uncertainty about how they see themselves. Their feelings for others can change quickly, and swing from extreme closeness to extreme dislike. These changing feelings can lead to unstable relationships and emotional pain.

Can a person with BPD really love? ›

The short answer is yes; individuals with BPD can feel and express love. However, their love experiences may be more intense, volatile, or influenced by fear and insecurity, primarily due to their heightened emotional sensitivity and fear of abandonment.

What is the dark side of borderline personality disorder? ›

People with borderline personality disorder have a strong fear of abandonment or being left alone. Even though they want to have loving and lasting relationships, the fear of being abandoned often leads to mood swings and anger. It also leads to impulsiveness and self-injury that may push others away.

What happens to borderlines as they age? ›

Symptoms of borderline personality disorder tend to decline with age. While the exact reasons are unknown, potential factors include reduced impulsivity, better coping skills, and the avoidance of triggers.

What does high-functioning BPD look like? ›

Discouraged Borderline (Quiet BPD): Also referred to as the high-functioning BPD (quiet borderline), this category of BPD makes one heavily dependent on others and practice avoidance. They are incredibly loyal and humble. However, this may make them clingy.

What is the biggest symptom of borderline personality disorder? ›

People with borderline personality disorder may experience intense mood swings and feel uncertainty about how they see themselves. Their feelings for others can change quickly, and swing from extreme closeness to extreme dislike. These changing feelings can lead to unstable relationships and emotional pain.

Are you born with BPD or does it develop? ›

Genetic factors and negative environmental influences from childhood are the primary causes of BPD, and it is highly unlikely that a person will develop borderline personality disorder if one or the other of these factors is lacking.

Is BPD inherited from mother or father? ›

Conclusions: Parental externalizing psychopathology and father's BPD traits contribute genetic risk for offspring BPD traits, but mothers' BPD traits and parents' poor parenting constitute environmental risks for the development of these offspring traits.

What is the life expectancy of someone with BPD? ›

The effects of untreated borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be devastating. For example, the physical and mental health impact of this disorder is so severe that life expectancy among people who have BPD is about 20 years less than the national average.

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